On forgiveness
I was never the type of person who harbor ill and resentful feeling towards other people. I mean, I get mad. Of course I get mad but the anger doesn't stay long. Once I say what I needed to say, that's it. I am a very forgiving person but ironically, I don't give my apologies away like spare change. If you're someone I apologize to, you're special to me but if you injure my pride by rejecting my apology, I'd completely cut you off and carry on with my life.
See, being the last person to not swallow your pride doesn't make you the winner. It simply makes you a person with so much hate in your heart. You may deny it and act like you just don't care but you're only fooling yourself. "I don't care!" - yeah okay, say it to yourself over and over again until you believe your own lie.
Some people refuse to bury the hatchet even if they are the ones who did the unloving actions that caused the feud. It may be because they do not want to swallow their pride but for the most part, it's because they can never admit to themselves that once upon a time, they did something that hurt people close to their hearts. Maybe they got hurt, too but that doesn't give them a free pass to an evil world that is against forgiveness.
No one is purely bad and everyone has their own reason why they don't want to apologize for their wrongdoings and forgive people who they feel like have done them wrong but that isn't an excuse to torture themselves… THEMSELEVES, yup, you've read it right. The person carrying anger is the loser in any scenario. Don't be that person. If you find it hard to forgive someone, think about those times when s/he never left your side because you needed a shoulder to cry on. Think about those nights you spent together drunk. Think about the things s/he said that made you feel better. It may not be enough to forgive the person but at least you have one reason why you should try.
Forgiving someone nor being forgiven, however, doesn't mean that things will instantly be back to normal. It would take time... or it may not even happen anymore but that's okay. What matters is that you are already free from anger that would never do you any good.
Now, if you're going to ask me why it's easy for me to forgive people who hurt me (even if they don't apologize!), it's because I know that there will never come a time when I will say "I wish I stayed angry longer".
"You don't forgive someone for his or her sake - you forgive them for your sake."
See, being the last person to not swallow your pride doesn't make you the winner. It simply makes you a person with so much hate in your heart. You may deny it and act like you just don't care but you're only fooling yourself. "I don't care!" - yeah okay, say it to yourself over and over again until you believe your own lie.
Some people refuse to bury the hatchet even if they are the ones who did the unloving actions that caused the feud. It may be because they do not want to swallow their pride but for the most part, it's because they can never admit to themselves that once upon a time, they did something that hurt people close to their hearts. Maybe they got hurt, too but that doesn't give them a free pass to an evil world that is against forgiveness.
"The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong." ~Mahatma Gandhi
No one is purely bad and everyone has their own reason why they don't want to apologize for their wrongdoings and forgive people who they feel like have done them wrong but that isn't an excuse to torture themselves… THEMSELEVES, yup, you've read it right. The person carrying anger is the loser in any scenario. Don't be that person. If you find it hard to forgive someone, think about those times when s/he never left your side because you needed a shoulder to cry on. Think about those nights you spent together drunk. Think about the things s/he said that made you feel better. It may not be enough to forgive the person but at least you have one reason why you should try.
Forgiving someone nor being forgiven, however, doesn't mean that things will instantly be back to normal. It would take time... or it may not even happen anymore but that's okay. What matters is that you are already free from anger that would never do you any good.
Now, if you're going to ask me why it's easy for me to forgive people who hurt me (even if they don't apologize!), it's because I know that there will never come a time when I will say "I wish I stayed angry longer".