I'm contradicting myself again.

While my life feels like a perpetual mess, I still try to look for something good in everyday. On most days, I struggle finding something to smile about. Well, either that or I find something but all the bad ones overwhelm me that looking on the bright side suddenly becomes rocket science.

People always tell each other that if you think positive, the universe will be on your side but that's so hard to believe if all the things you used to believe in stop making sense. Honestly, I am one of those people. I encourage my friends to overlook the bad things and focus on the good ones. You know, "Hang in there", "Things are eventually going to be okay", "You're going to be fine", and all synonymous cliches but I know they're bullshit. But then again, I tend to contradict myself. Hence, the title of this post.

Sometimes I tell myself, why do I even bother? Expect the worst. At least I wouldn't be too disappointed nor surprised when things blow up in my face.

Oh well.